The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any. ~ Alice Walker
Sometimes it is hard to remember that we write our own stories.
Life throws curve balls however as much as it may seem like the external world can bring us down, ultimately we each have the power to define ourselves and the life we lead. The question is whether we choose to use it, or not.
Having felt totally out of wack lately I once again found myself confronted by the fear of losing myself again. In the toughest of moments it is so hard to see the wood for the trees. Your thoughts are your own worst enemy. You want to run away, hide from the world. You hope that when you next open your eyes things will be different, that horrible sinking feeling gone and it will be a new day.
How do You make it through in one piece?
There is no quick fix, that’s for sure. Whether you are battling with depression, anxiety, rejection, loss, grief, lacking in direction or more, the only person who can bring you back from it is you. There is never one way, and it is different for each of us but this is what has brought me back this past week.
I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become. ~ Carl Jung
Stop and Accept
It is okay to not be okay. We all need to be gentle with ourselves at times. There is no shame in admitting we’re not okay, to ourselves and to others. It is all too easy to keep going. We distract ourselves, tell ourselves to keep going but deep down inside all is not well. We have to stop and accept what has happened.
I have never opened up to people the way in which I have this past week or two. It was the best thing I could have done. We tend to think people will judge us the harsh ways in which we judge ourselves, not true. It is at times like this where you find out how awesome people really are. Be brave, be bold and even if it is just to one person say it out loud, “I am not okay.” People will surprise you.
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. ~ Eleanor Roosevelt
Avoid procrastination and escapism
Eeek, this one is hard. Dwelling on the past and going over and over every minute detail of your day is bad news folks. Reliving every time you have felt rejected or believed you failed is a big no no. No drink, drugs, excessive shopping, meaningless sex, over working or anything else that enables you to avoid facing reality and ultimately leaves you feeling ten times worse. Be gentle with yourself. Be present. Be realistic about what is going on right now and don’t allow the past and past behaviours to creep back in.
It is all too easy to be proud and to try and manage by yourself, however you do not have to be alone. I spent years battling by myself and I wish someone had told me this at the time. Let go and allow others to help you. Whether family, friends, or therapists, there are people out there who will support you.
I’m stronger because of the hard times, wiser because of my mistakes, and happier because I have known sadness. ~ Unknown
Do what makes you feel good
This one is entirely personal. After time in nature I feel a zillion times better. Dogs never fail to make me smile. Inspiring quotes give me a boost. Cheese and chocolate bring comfort, as do bubble baths and fluffy blankies. I have my healer on speed dial and my gratitude diary at hand. Whatever it is that makes you feel safe, comforted and cared for do it. You’re worth it.
See the humour
Find things which make you laugh and when you are ready you will smile.
Because of your smile, you make life more beautiful. ~Thich Nhat Hanh