When I graduated in my mid-twenties I was certain that it would be the moment my life came together. As I walked away top of my class, with an award and a big cheque, it seemed a dead cert to me that EVERTHING was about to fall into place. Ta da!
I have always seen each New Year as a blank book, with each new day a clean page to be filled. Exciting, right? I realise now that regardless of where we are in the year each day is blank and each day we have the opportunity to fill it how we wish. Choices, they are ours to make. I know now that nothing external can complete us and the only thing that will ever make us whole is ourselves.
It is so easy to get carried away in the promise of New Year resolutions, hell now you even get additional motivation through discounted gym offers and you can give up booze for charity. Boom. You can save money and help others by changing your whole life on 1st January. Congratulations. But, can you keep it up? According to Forbes apparently only 8% of us can!
New Year, new you? Sorry kiddo, I’m afraid you will wake up on 1st January exactly the same person as the day before. Fact.
In 2013 I changed my life significantly but it wasn’t based on declarations on a particular day, it was a gradual process and it was a case of 50/50 pre-meditated action and synchronicity. True story.
My goal was simple, albeit a bit wishy-washy. I wanted to better myself, to grow as a person mind, body and soul. It had been on the cards for a while but it isn’t a particularly easy feat when you are battling with mental health problems, I can tell you. You want to make a change, you are the only one who can do it.
Know what you want
Sounds pretty obvious I know but let’s say we’re intention setting (for example), we need to be clear. So you want to get healthy, how exactly? Give up caffeine? Go vegetarian? What are your motivations? Animal-lover? Weight loss? Ask yourself, “What is it I really want?”
Last year I thought I wanted to lose weight but I later realised it wasn’t really about the weight but my lifestyle in general. I wanted to discover myself now I had meds to allow me that freedom. That was my goal, exploration of who I was and who I wanted to be. Exciting.
Believe in yourself and be open-minded
I have always believed that we are capable of achieving anything we want. History is full of folk who would agree with that and have proved it. Okay, so occasionally you’ll come across people who say “Oh no you can’t!”, they’ll try to convince you that you’re not capable or that your aspirations are unrealistic. Don’t be fooled or get sidetracked, just gracefully thank them for their opinions and move on. Know what you want and believe in yourself.
I have always believed in myself, admittedly that belief has been rocked at times but I doubt we could find anyone whose hasn’t. Ultimately I know I can achieve anything. The truth is sometimes I don’t achieve what I thought I wanted but something else
comes my way instead. Last year I wanted to be healthy and lose weight, I set a goal and I knew exactly what I wanted. Or so I thought. As it turned out instead I learnt the difference between dieting to shed the pounds and a healthy diet. Meeting Green Smoothies and quitting caffeine changed my life. I may still have a few pounds to shed but ultimately I am 100% healthier than I was. I learnt that you can’t necessarily predict the precise outcome of your intention, but it’s still pretty cool however it turns out.
Okay so just because you believe in yourself doesn’t mean you don’t have to lift a finger. We should be so lucky. Remember the journey is just as important as the destination! Like I said, things don’t always work out exactly as we imagined. Start today and do one thing, anything, just do something. All our actions have ripples, who knows where things will lead.
Last year I started reading the social media posts of someone I had never met, the wife of a guy I knew who now lives on the other side of the world. Random. I can’t even remember the exact moment but at some point I sent her a message and we started talking. Through her I got introduced to other people with similar interests. I found the delights of green smoothies. I discovered yoga. I came across Reiki and met another new friend. I read book after book and went to an event that had a profound effect on me. My point being is that, you never know what can happen from one small action. Isn’t that incredible?
Forget the how
How much time have you spent thinking about how you are going to achieve something? STOP! Right now. Think about when you split up with your ex or left your last job or home, could you ever have foreseen how life would be now? Nope. Know what you want, believe it is already yours, take action but do NOT spend a second worrying about how you’ll get to where you want to be, just trust you’ll get there. It may not be exactly what you expected but you will get what you want.
If someone had told me a year ago my daily practice would consist of meditation, Reiki and chanting (don’t laugh, it rocks, plus I get to sing my little socks off every day. Watch out Adele!), well, yep, I would have laughed too and told them “as if!”. I have never been so happy. Not at all what I expected but I have grown so much, even in the last 6 months alone. Amazing.
Time and patience
This step is simple. It ain’t going to happen over-night sweet pea. Sadly. Does it matter though? You know what you want, you believe in yourself and that it’s going to happen, you’ve taken the baby steps to get there but you’re not worried about how it will happen because you know it WILL happen.
In the past I have become so obsessed with achieving things that on occasion life has passed me by. I had to have everything right now, this instance. Don’t do it to yourself. What you want is already out there. It may not be today or tomorrow so for now enjoy life, have fun, and wrap yourself up in the comfort that you can have everything you desire.
Every day is a blank page, how exciting is that? You want to be healthy, financially abundant, a yogi, set up your business, get that dream job, save the world and find your soul-mate. Start today. Commit to the gym or a swim once a week. Start saving whatever you can afford a week, a month. Take that yoga class. Write a business plan. Write your CV. Join a dating site. Start volunteering. It doesn’t matter what day it is, it doesn’t have to be perfect, just take the first step. You can do it!
What do you really want?