Whether you love ’em, loathe ’em, or are not particular fussed, birthdays are inevitable, unless you’re a goner beforehand that is. My feelings towards my own have shifted significantly over the years.
In the era of Poor Me From Divorced Parents it was a rubbish time, waiting desperately for my dad to call. Although, that was a mild improvement from the Head Down the Toilet Years when food ruled my life and the only thing I hated more than celebrating my existence was my actual being itself. As for significant birthdays, what a blast! At 18 I was in an abusive relationship which eventually took over a decade to recover from. At 21 I was in a loving relationship but with an unwanted pregnancy, and my 30th was spent with the most incredible friends but battling against psychosis. Over the years through paranoia and depression the last thing a person wants is a day all about them, when everyday was shit there is always one day that managed to sink them even lower, guess which? Happy Birthday me, sorry no one’s coming to your pity party because you never spoke up. Note: #timetotalk
I am pleased to report those days have gone and I have no problem celebrating all things ME, in fact I do it more than once year nowadays, and why not. I am fabulous, and so are YOU. Hooray for us!
Always remember that you are who and where you are today because of what has gone before, there is no space for regrets. Personally, I have spent too much time hanging my head in shame, racked with guilt and self-loathing, never again! Step out of the past, stand still in the present and be prepared to skip into your future.
The lovely Tara Stiles summed it up quite nicely for me this week:
Practice how you want to be.
Practice being grateful for what you have.
Practice being patient with yourself.
Practice ease in your body.
Practice ease in your mind.
Practice mindful communication with others.
Practice valuing yourself.
Practice valuing others.
Practice loving yourself.
Practice loving others.
Practice using your talents to serve.
Watch yourself when you drift off.
Practice coming back.
Practice how you want to be.
Become the person you want to be.
Enjoy the ride.
Don’t you find you can’t help but but reflect upon the past year on your birthday? For me, as it falls near the end of the year, I get a double whammy of “What have I achieved this year?”. For me it’s easy, I am so grateful that I have recovered from a debilitating illness that whatever else I have or haven’t achieved it’s okay. I am happy, I am healthy and I am incredibly grateful for being me and the wonderful life that is mine. What other achievement comes close to that? The fact that I have a job which I love, amazing family and friends, so much love in my life I could burst, topped with the fact that I am the best version of me I could be, well, that’s just an added bonus.
Happy Birthday Me. And, Happy Friday YOU!